Lalala... I've been staying at home resting and relaxing as if there is no class, exam or fyp going on.. I feel so disconnected from uni world.. I don't feel like going back there somehow @@"
This 2nd surgery, my surgeon decided not to stitch the wound though it's much bigger than before.. Imagine Harry Potter's scar (the shape) but you can even look into the flesh.. As if a chunk of meat got scrap out.. It's too gross to even let anyone see...
I only got to see my own wound today when i went to the hospital for dressing.. Since the doc didn't stitch it, so it's an open wound and very easily get infectious unless i go for dressing daily... The procedure is really painful and i think i'm gonna have to take some painkillers everyday before going to the hospital.. Since today it was the nurse who did my dressing, i insisted to see my own wound so that i know how bad is it... And as i said it was gross and really made my heart sink... I couldn't help thinking "how am i going to heal from this?"
I was this close *showing the tiny gap between fingers* to heal from the 1st operation or so i thought... All the 'pantang', all the activities that i missed just so i can heal faster, really for nothing=(
I'll be lying if i'm positive i can heal this time *dejected*
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